Have you heard of Neuroaesthetics?

It is honestly what I have known in my bones to be true all these years so this expanding field of research is so exciting for me. Let’s dive in! Neuroaesthetics is basically the way you feel when you take in art and beauty. Us humans are wired to be drawn to the magnificent and it is hard wired apparently. Think of how calm you feel when you sit in a beautiful courtyard filled with green plants and you hear a flowing fountain. Or the emotion provoked when you are watching a movie. Or the peace you feel when you are in nature. Neuroaethetics explains why good art can literally move us to tears. Sometimes it can feel as if the artist has imprinted on you the emotion they were feeling. Neuroaesthetics explains why good art can promote deep empathy.

Being with beauty can light up the circuits in our brain where we feel pleasure and joy. It activates all the good neurotransmitters like dopamine, oxytocin and serotonin. And this happens when we take in art and beauty as well as when we create it ourselves. This is why accessing your creativity can feel like unkinking a hose and being in a flow state. Anyone who knows that place understands what wonders it can do for our vitality and feeling alive! We need hospitals and assisted living facilities and mental health facilities and crisis centers move form a cold institutional place to places that exude warmth and inspire life.

I did not have this term when I started doing this work so many years ago however I absolutely knew that this was happening on a biological level. That beauty making and beauty imbibing is healing. That tending to your space calms your nervous system and makes room for more positivity to enter your room and your brain and your life. This kind of transformation absolutely activates and elevates the quality of your life. I feel more confident knowing that the gift of my sensitivities are proven to be true. I really hope further research in this field will see art and beauty as an integral part of our wellness and a necessity for us all.

Spruce came to me for a blurb on an article they were writing about Organizing

Here is what I wrote:

The thing I always notice about being in peoples homes is the state of their nervous system right off the bat, however it is not as straight forward as it sounds. For instance, it seems obvious that a cluttered space is an activated nervous system but it might actually be a shut down NS that cannot deal due to the overwhelm factor. Here a persons nervous system response to stress is to shut down even though that perpetuates the stress cycle. It is so much easier to work with it however when I explore with my client what is happening in their bodies. Through this biological lense it is less triggering, less personal and less shameful and we can begin with strategies for stress management to stay engaged with life.

Now a very tidy fresh space may make you think of a calm nervous system however it can be masking a hyper vigilant NS at work straightening and picking up anything that might lead to chaos or distraction. There is also a chance that the the home is presenting perfect but there are hidden cupboards or closets stuffed with all the exiles. Here we work with slowing down a tad and tending to all parts and working with some trust and softening.

When you can observe and learn about a person’s nervous system you not only help them create calm order in their space but also in their minds hearts and bodies. It becomes a beautiful dialogue for them to be in connection with and anchor into for the rest of their lives.

Tips and Tricks

I was honored when Redfin came to me for a tip on a habit that would help others get organized. Below is my tip:

“The gift of a beautiful space is that it can so easily connect you to your own heart. Tending and organizing your home is like writing love letters to your space every day and who doesn’t adore love letters? Remember that clutter is just a pile of decisions you have not made yet. When you see piles that overwhelm you from that perspective the practice is tapping back into your intuition and trusting you know how to make the right decisions for your life. I challenge you to look at those piles of clutter in this way from now on and act from a place of faith and heart rather than a place of fear and dread.” – Organize me, Penelope

Head over to their website to read all the other amazing tips and tricks my fellow colleagues had to say. They are all so fundamental and each have worth.

Make sure you follow your own internal compass when following others for strategies as no two minds or hearts are alike. Knowing if it resonates for you is a good key to try it. And trying things is the name of the game as we do not need to do it all perfectly we just need to be engaged in our own lives and process.

You will find and connect to what you are seeking.

Tending to the things

Today was a day like other days except today I was home all day because of the covid virus so it wasn’t quite like other days expect it was. I had more time today to make three teas and call back people I needed to get in touch with and get back on instagram to feel better connected and take two short walks and clean small spaces.

I started out tending to small spaces. I bathed my crystals in the bath and then rearranged them. I sprayed down the dining room table. I picked street flowers and put them in the guest bathroom. I burned incense in the hallway and I reheated chicken soup for lunch.

I realized that in my work as an spatial intuitive it is often the simple act of touching our things that makes our spaces feel awake and alive in a way they did not before our touching and tending. Sometimes you do not even need to make it look differently or purge a thing you just need to touch your things. You need to wake them out of trance and reset the energy in your space. In these ways we are engaged with a tangible object in an intangible way.

Creating Beauty

Creating Beauty is a necessity rather than a luxury. It helps us stay in direct dialogue with our higher selves. It helps us stay our course. It allows us to feel into a resonance which reflects to our inner self to vibrate higher. It is a path to feeling worthy and lovable. Lighting a candle. Setting up an altar. Buying your home flowers. Putting the sea salt in a shell on the table. These are all ways to spark this sacred dialogue and stay on your rightful path. Any one of these things require some energy and tending and yet it is in this very action that informs us and inspires us to keep writing these love letters to our lives. Beauty is a a spark of light that reminds you of your own loving kindness. Don’t put off such an essential movement. Allow yourself to stay open to the creative fire that burns within each of our hearts.

Investing

Recently I came back from a workshop that was mainly about rewriting the stories we tell ourselves about our lives especially when they no linger ring true. This workshop was based on the research and work of the amazing Brene Brown, a teacher I consider of one of the best calibers as per the way her right and left brain so wonderfully interact and inform. Her book, The Gifts of Imperfection, I must have bought at least 100 times as it was the book I first gifted coaching clients when I began my practice. I would ask them to read it during our time together if it resonated and if so we could have our own personal book club. I have stopped gifting this book as I have learned that not all clients need the same message however I will still recommend it when I feel it is just the right words for just the right person.

Some of the highlights of this workshop besides not having a phone or internet service for three days was looking at the heavy burdensome rock like things we all carry around with us and simply stopping to see if they really serve us anymore and if so in which ways. I felt the heavy load lighten a bit after my time and I intentionally set down some old stories I have been carrying around that aren’t fully precise or even true at all. I have since found the space that action created within me is invaluable. This space has since been filled with what I truly want to tend to and care for. It has allowed me to let more joy into my life and truly grieve what needs to die.

I tend to learn experientially and rumble with things in order to sort them out. Letting this process in to occur is the first step. Investing in ourselves in this modern world as somewhat challenging as we are told in sublime messages to keep our productivity up and never leave the sides of our children. I remember waking up one morning about six weeks prior to the retreat and my intuition said to look for getaways that will allow me to do my own work. Every year or so I have this need to go away somewhere outside of fun family or romantic trips and adventures but somewhere I can go within so I can come back to this life more fully myself and awake. I am grateful I listened and vow to continue to listen to these guiding parts of myself which truly know what I need on the deepest level. There are a million excuses to put ourselves off yet nothing is as important or will serve the world more than tending to ourselves.

Humble appreciation

This picture was my folks house on Tortola in the British Virgin Islands. They lived here from when I was 11-18 years old.  They built this small but spectacular home after buying land overlooking Cane Garden Bay.  My father would go up after work with a machete to clear the site of the tiny home.  the unique thing about this rustic home is that only the two bedrooms and kitchen had screened in walls. the rest of the living area just had a roof and where walls and windows normally would have gone was just a raw unobstructed 180 degree view of light blue ocean and the neighboring island. 

My mom would require us to to join her every evening to the right of this photo in the "living rom" to take in the golden hour sunset show with the sounds of Cane Garden Bay drifting in from below. It was living in connection to something greater than my teenage self.  Then the dark would take over with the chorus of the island tree frogs sweetly croaking "coqui coqui".  So much so visitors found it too loud to sleep. My folks are continuing their legacy of finding residence alongside the beauty of raw nature now up in Orcas Island. Their joint quest for what is true to them has always been an inspiration and even if not understood at the time a humble joy to witness.

The Need to Please..AKA abandoning yourself

This is a seductive trap we all fall into once and a while. Underneath the surface is usually the value of belonging.  Yet our saboteur sneaks into this golden value and tarnishes it so that we can hardly see our own reflection any longer.  Instead we only see what others want us to be and we get confused thinking this is the pathway towards love acceptance and belonging.  We think we have to become worthy as if that is a thing to attain. We forget we already own that but have given it away over and over again.

You see when we go for pleasing others or chameleoinzing we usually abandon ourselves in the mix.  This leads to a compartmentalized life that doesn't feel good. What if instead we chose to live from an embodied joyful place where first we check in with self and then other in a loop of awareness.  Would this not be radical? Once we learn to check in with ourselves we can then turn our attention to other but in a much more compassionate gaze. Only at that point or we able to ask, "What is it that they are feeling and needing?" We ask this from a genuine place of empathy rather than pleasing. We may not be able to fulfill their needs however once we fill ourselves up we give others an opportunity to be heard and seen.  This creates a sense of belonging in the truest sense.  

Sacred and Scared

I find it interesting that sacred and scared or so close together in the English language.  Just with a skip of the "c" and you go from faith to fear... from trust  to doubt. Isn't that just he trick in most situations in life? You can really  only come from one space or from the other.  If your intention is to create a sacred space then there is no room for fear in that. Perhaps it shows up in your process but it has to be placed elsewhere as it certainly does not belong on the altar. When I go to sacred I think of power and connecting to the light... I think of expansion and open windows. I see fear as a gateway to sacred.  Either you can let fear lead you or you can use it as an invitation to kneel and sit beside yourself.  Next to your fear.. next to your power.. letting all parts exist. 

My Approach

You belong here. You have something you want to transform and that belongs here too. My approach is to be the container for your aspirations. To hold the light to all you desire so you can see it more clearly. We will create beauty together and reveal the joy in your everyday moments. Every moment is an invitation to come back home to yourself.